Darkness of Light (Katy Perry’s Hot ‘N’ Cold Meets Twilight) | 1 Star Book Review

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By: Stacey Marie Brown

# 1 in the Darkness Series |310 Pages | Pub. 2013

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Darkness of Light At a Glance

  • Overall Rating: ★
  • Dude # 1: Torin = basically a very polite 18th century gentleman robot
  • Dude # 2: Eli = Bipolar and moody AF
  • Heroine: Narcoleptic ostrich
  • Trainwreck:  And you thought Twilight was bad?!
  • Misogyny: Did Trump, Pence and Stephanie Meyer co-write this?

Pairs Well With

A Dumpster Fire

Beware. Spoilers are coming…


 

Teagan’s Reactions 

CW: Sexual assault

I can’t remember the last time I gave a one-star review. And I feel a little bad that I strongly dislike the work of an author that I’m sure put a lot of time and effort into this book.  But honestly this book was just a terrible experience for me. I do not understand how it has a 3.97 Goodreads ranking because I can’t think of a single thing in this novel that was enjoyable.

“To me you are a transaction, merely merchandise. Incredibly useful merchandise I will say…”

My biggest complaint is that all every single male in this novel treats Ember like a possession that they can use. Even the “good” guys and “love interests” (brb vomiting) trade her like a cow and it sent me into a homicidal rage. I felt like this book reverted back to the Dark Ages and it wasn’t okay to treat women like that then and it sure as hell isn’t okay to do it now.

And speaking of “love interests” let’s talk about these fuckboys. Eli gave me whiplash from his mood swings and I felt like I was living out Katy Perry’s “Hot N Cold” song as he wanted Ember one second and treated her like trash the next. I lost count of how many scenes this happened in because it literally happened in every single scene with these two. My personal favorite is minutes after Eli finds out that Ember was sexually assaulted he 1) violently chokes her and 2) then kisses her, and then 3) treats her like a whore and finally 4) abandons her in the woods. The fact that this book ends up on lists as one of the best New Adult romances makes me want to revolt. This is not acceptable behavior and is only #relationshipgoals for serial killers.

“Oh no! She is coming to me now!”  

And now onto “love interest” # 2, Torin. I couldn’t take this fuckboy seriously from the first interaction with him because he basically speaks like a 18th century robot who only speaks in the language of cryptic. The majority of his scenes are in “dreamscapes” where he speaks in the vaguest possible terms about the great danger Ember is in. My “favorite” scene is when he kisses her on the forehead instead of telling her about this “great danger.” Newsflash, Torin, kisses on foreheads don’t save lives, information does!!! And he supposedly loves her and she is “his” (vomit) but is responsible for imprisoning her and her killing half of Seattle. Somehow “mass murder” never really popped up on my list of romantic dates.

“That’s not information with which you need to concern yourself.”

I don’t have anything positive to say about Ember and that makes me sad. I don’t like to call women stupid. But girl is stupid and honestly lacked respect for herself. I want to hug her and explain that sticking her head in the sand and pretending like things aren’t happening and it’s okay for people to treat you like garbage is not okay.

And the cavalier way Brown throws in a sexual assault scene made me actually sick. Rape is not a plot device.


Jess’s Reactions

Holy trainwreck batman.

I’m not sure what I just read, but it seemed like a mashup of The Babysitter’s club, Dr. Doolittle and a porno. The dialogue was so juvenile it felt like an anti-bullying play that the teacher’s in Mean Girls would put on. Except no Tina Fey…

Example of mean girl bullying:

“Why don’t you, plain Jane, and the gay Teletubby over there go home and play on your Ouija board?”

My soul hurts. Terribly. That is not how 18 yr olds act. Not even close.

This whole book was just a cluster of nonsense. OMG the girl named Ember dreams of fire? No way! I wouldn’t have guessed that ever.

There is no amount of eye-rolling that can explain.

Then, this girl basically stalks a guy who clearly doesn’t like her. Leave Eli alone girl!!! He choked you and left you in the woods and your response is “I don’t know why he pushes me away, but I won’t let him.”

I mean obviously Eli is messed up in the head if he goes anywhere near Ember, but she practically follows him home. This girl passes out and blushes every other sentence. She needs to decide if she is 12 or 18 and stay there. No joke at least 4 chapters ended in blackout for Ember. I’m over it.

And this whole “got expelled and the cops hate me” thing was just nonsensical. There is no legal backing to do something like that. Especially for a fucking 18 yr old! You can’t kick people out of the public school system without proof. I can’t even deal with this plot line.

Did no one else have a major gross moment when Ember fangirls over wearing Eli’s sweaty helmet? Ick.

The two of them are a no go for me.

“The intense heat from his body warmed mine, making me feel the need to sleep-or throw up.”

WHAT. Ew. They have the weirdest, most uncomfortable push-pull relationship I have ever read. It isn’t healthy and I feel awkward to even have read about this.

And then, just when I thought Ember couldn’t be a bigger idiot, she takes a bunch of shots of tequila and walks into a creepy ass bar to talk to bikers. Clearly she doesn’t listen to enough true crime podcasts.

If you spiral on down the rabbit hole, they content dump on her at the end. Basically she is fae and they are too, but she is evil and must be murdered or used as a weapon. Then all of a sudden Seattle is burning to the ground and the guy from her dreams shows up to tell her to find some dude named Lars…

I want to sneak a look at the next book to ensure this is not Lars from Metallica, because honestly, it could go there and it wouldn’t surprise me. In fact, that is the best outcome I can foresee for this book.


Let us know what you thought of Darkness of Light in the comments! Join us in our rage.

Drink Up - Teagan & Jess

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7 thoughts on “Darkness of Light (Katy Perry’s Hot ‘N’ Cold Meets Twilight) | 1 Star Book Review

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