By: Shannon Mayer
# 1 in the Desert Cursed series | 370 pages | Pub. 2018
Witch’s Reign at a Glance
- Overall Rating: ★★★
- Dude: We’d probably would make out with him then leave him, too
- Heroine: She started off as a cannon and ended up as a fountain in a cul de sac
- Emotional: Darcy “something borrows” steve and it hurts
- Brutal: Not brutal enough honestly
Pairs Well With
- 2 oz raspberry flavored vodka
- 2.5 oz orange juice
- 2.5 oz pineapple juice
- Splash of grenadine
- Top of with orange wedge and a cherry
Beware. Spoilers are coming…
This book started off so strong. Zamira is on the run from giants and is generally kicking ass which I really respect. I loved that Zam is a fellow lover of foul-language and her monologue complaining about Steve the Worthless and making up new cuss words to distract the giants had me nearly peeing my pants.
“What could I say? The giants deserved at least a one-finger salute.”
What I did not need from Mayer was this description:
“The giant in the middle was the queen… and had three tits that hung almost to her waist. As I watched, two of them swung so hard that they hit the giant next to her, knocking him backward on her ass.”
Sorry to make y’all read it too but I could not suffer alone. I do not want to be the only one with that image in my head. Gross.
Zamira, despite being a housecat shifter, went downhill really fast for me. Her prejudice against humans and her failure to realize, despite multiple hints and outright statements, that Mak was not human, were just hard no’s. I just can’t stomach a clueless girl and a racist one.
“You’re human, aren’t you? I almost said. But something held me back. It was ridiculous. Of course, he was human. He smelled as human as he could. Merlin was just playing games with my head.”
I wanted to shake her and give her a talk about stupidity not being attractive. It’s almost not even okay that she’s mad at Maks for lying to her because she was so oblivious about it. Almost.
Steve, you dude, deserve to die, violently. I have not a single positive thing to say about you. And Kiara you deserve this shitty mate for being complicit in his asshatery. I’m exiling you both to Jerk Island.
Maks was promising for a hot second. But I did not love his whole monologue about how Zam was weak because she isn’t a lion shifter but will allow it because he was trying to prove a point… I think? What I do not stand for and what is about to get him kicked off to Jerk Island, is that he clearly has feelings for Zam but kept a giant secret from her the whole book. Then at the end he’s like “let me explain” and “please forgive me.” Secrets send me into a rage. I turn into an evil witch who wants to vanquish the characters that force me to endure this. Just. Freaking. Talk. To. Each. Other. You. Peasants.
Darcy- I hope you didn’t think I was going to let you off the hook because I’m coming for you, you little rodent. Being drunk is not an excuse to sleep with your best friends husband. I can’t believe I had to type that sentence. Go rot in the desert you terrible person.
Honestly, the only characters I really liked were Balder and Batman and for a girl with a horse phobia, that’s saying something. I was intrigued enough by the world to try the second book so hopefully some of the kinks will be worked out with some serious character development and growth.
There was so much promise at the beginning of this book. Zamira was sassy and we hated Steve as much as she hated Steve and his boring name. She has an awesome horse Balder and they seem to make one heck of an ass-kicking team. But when we got to the middle of the book the story just fell flat. The sass was there, but we were so confused about where the overall plot was going that everything felt disjointed and slow.
I did like Maks and Zamira and their back and forth. Especially when Lila chimed in. But, like Zam, we weren’t sure if we could trust them (probably we couldn’t) and it was hard to keep reading when I only liked one character. While, I didn’t think I could trust him, I love myself a good mystery. Especially in the form of a hot guy. The mystery of Maks and the way he bonded with Batman so easily made me crush a little. He got pretty cheesy when he used the whole “fight off the cold with body heat” line though. And unlike Teagan, I forgive his omission because there is no way in hell that Zam would have found out what he is and said “Oh it’s, okay. At least you told me before I randomly found out.” He saw the way that her and Steve were, what man in his right mind would purposefully throw themselves into that line of fire? None.
Darcy – you are a bitch and no you shouldn’t die for what you did, but who in the hell sleeps with her best friend’s husband and then goes “Oh whoops!” Nope. Not cool. Zam shouldn’t have forgiven her so easily. I saw zero redeeming qualities in Darcy so I couldn’t figure out why Zam was on this crazy mission to begin with!
“The surest way to hate someone to the core of your soul is to love and trust them with all your heart first.”
Steve – You piece of shit you aren’t worth my time.
I’m pretty sure I will give the second book a read, but I am going to need a little more from this one. The first was just too easy to put down.
Let us know what you thought of Witch’s Reign in the comments!